I just wanted to jump right in and share what my life is like post CIRS diagnosis, pre- full recovery. It's tough. I want to be healthy so I make a LOT of sacrifices. These sacrifices include: avoiding indoors of friends homes, avoiding my church building, food elimination diets, avoiding alcohol, avoiding sugar, eating regularly to manage blood sugar, sleeping regularly, getting sunshine when I can (Ohio can be a challenge) and thus learning to love the outdoors no matter the temperature. I also have to clean before friends or family come over and thoroughly clean when they leave. These are the choices I have made in order to heal - but it's still been a very slow and frustrating process. I don't want to have to do these things. I've learned that I have a false belief that I am entitled to a stress-free, healthy, life. I've learned that I also feel entitled to be able to do "what everyone else is doing" (including eating junk food on a regular basis, or drinking alcohol regularly).
The funny thing is, everyone has to make choices like this - or suffer the consequences. What about the diabetic who has to monitor blood sugar or he/she may die? What about the alcoholic who must abstain from alcohol and all forms of recreational behaviors for fear of falling off the wagon again? We ALL have choices to make. God has pushed me to do a lot of work inside myself, inside my heart, to WANT to make the choices that make me a good steward of my body. Am I perfect? No, absolutely not. I do get better daily, though. I keep working at it. When I don't think I can anymore, I ask God for His help. I lean on my husband. I talk with my amazing Christian community. And I try again.
My life with CIRS is completely different. I don't go into grocery stores. I don't go inside restaurants. I don't fly in airplanes or sit in airports... Yet, I should be focusing not on what I CAN'T do, but what I am able to do, since making these choices. This includes the ability to:
get out of bed in the morning without crushing depression,
go for long walks, even hikes!, swim, and do physical activity for multiple hours,
I don't snap at my husband when he doesn't deserve it (which is honestly never, but I could attempt to justify a few moments...),
I can sustain my attention to read books and enjoy them,
I have dramatically reduced stress and anxiety,
Sleep through the night most of the time, and not sleeping lightly anymore,
I can eat a wider variety of foods and my gut function has improved dramatically (I'm more regular, PTL!),
I can take road trips,
I have found ways to be social: drive in theater instead of indoor movie theater; hosting/attending cookouts; winter time hikes and outdoor adventures
Most of all - I am closer to God now than I ever was. I wouldn't trade that for anything. So instead of focusing on what I give up every day, I'm trying to focus on all that I have gained. I hope you can make your own list of what you have gained for your sacrifices, and feel joy thinking on your list.
